It's been one of those weird days. Things seemed to be going well at first but started to wallow towards evening and ended in a conversation that really should not have happened with an old friend. I have this problem. I find it monstrously difficult to keep my mouth shut about something.
Secrets are OK, but if there's some nagging issue with a person, I keep wanting to mention it when I'm talking to them. And that happened tonight.
I'm not pleased. Not at all. In fact I am deeply angry at myself for being such a fool. It'd be fine, just a simple peccadillo, if I hadn't done it so many damn times before. An apology is not enough. I must feel bad about this for some time in penance. Perhaps I will write about it.
Perhaps not.
But I need to sort it out.
In my head and in the real world. The former is far more important.
That's all.
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Well, chances are if you're aware of the ongoing issue with the person then so are they. I know what you mean though, especially if you think it's something they need to address if only for their own good. Next time you're talking to something where you have an issue, identify the moment in you're mind when you're about to say something and then bite your tongue, make a conscious decision not to say it. It's bloody hard but eventually you'll get used to not saying whatever comes into you're head and it'll make everything easier for everyone. On the upside it's good to identify these things about yourself, people spend so much time giving out about other people and what they do without taking a look at themselves and trying to make an improvement there instead so good for you :)
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